To the Girl Who's Drowning

A comment wasn't enough because I had to tell you more.

You are gorgeous. I wish you can see that about yourself. I wish you can see the potential that I see in you. But you don't. Instead you take each and every part of yourself and rip it to pieces until it seems like nothing is worth living for. Not even your own self-worth when that really is all that matters. All I ever wanted to say was have a little self-confidence, bring those lips to a genuine smile and for once be happy for yourself. Not for him, not for them, not for anyone else, but yourself. The chance at life should be enough to give you a reason to breath.

Bad things happen, we get hurt, you got hurt. I may not know what it is nor would I probably understand the true depth of the pain you feel, but you've let it eat you alive already. Is that the legacy you want to leave behind? Knowing that you've lost before you've even put up a fight? As you've said, "put up a fucking fight". I know you're better than that. You are better than that, don't let your bad past define who you are in the future, don't let it destroy your happiness because I can see it festering inside your heart, the sleepless nights and the way you curl yourself away from the world-- unmoving and vulnerable. I can only reach my hand to you so far and say that I can relate, it's a terrible place to be-- in that endless void of a hole where it seems like time is endless and day and night begin to sound and look the same... But at some point you're going to have to crawl out of that misery and start rebuilding that broken heart of yours.

To love a person means also learning to compromise, to love is to be vulnerable. It also means you're going to get hurt. A lot. A little. Different circumstances. Love is a gamble and a risk. Just because you gave them your whole world doesn't mean they're going to return that favor to you. You give them 200% and they can still take your heart wring it ever so slowly until it breaks to a million pieces then proceed to dump it a boiling pot of salt water. It's a harsh reality. But we take that leap anyways because for that brief moment of happy bliss, we are satisfied. But if and when it stops, you get your heart broken, you cry, you're going to get angry, but after move on. Things aren't going to get any better if you stay locked up forever in your room. If you want to change something, you're going to have to actually get off your ass and make it happen.

He never stopped loving you, he wanted it to work. The way he told us when he came to us, broken, dejected, and just plain exhausted, he said "I really thought she was the one," He just couldn't physically do it anymore. Coming back from work only to stay up with you every night because you couldn't sleep. He'll manage two-three hours of sleep before going back to a 8-10 work day. It was wearing him down, couldn't you see he was falling apart? In the process of keeping his promise to take care of you, his own health was put into compromise. He's sacrificed so much to be with you and yet you say he never loved or cherished you is a lie. Relationships is a two way street, you take care of each other, not just one person forever protecting the other.

You said that if a person truly loved someone, they'll let them go is total bullshit. It isn't entirely bull, you can't stop yourself from moving forward just for love or else you're going to be stuck. It may be a happy moment you want to keep forever, but it'll only suffocate and wither just like a flower if you feed it too much water. It'll drown. You have to give it space to grow and be better. He had a life to live. He had a career he wanted to think about, a future, especially a future with you in it. But you didn't want to let go of the beginning moments when everything was still new and thrilling. You were essentially stuck afraid to move on with him. He let you go because you needed to learn how to stand on your own two feet without relying on him. He felt like you were denigrating by being with him, you were becoming heavily dependent on him that you forgot to be independent. On your own. He just wanted you to be strong, yet you weren't letting yourself...

You gotta learn to let go... Live and be happy.

New Paleo Things

I've been trying a few things the past few months to try and tone up and lose weight at the same time, but after two months of trying, I wasn't seeing the results that I had wanted. A good friend of mine actually suggested changing my diet, because a big part of losing weight is about what you put in your body. I considered it and the thought of change terrified me. I love my food, especially carbs. But nothing was going to change if I didn't take the first step and so my journey into the Paleo World began. In short, a paleo diet basically mean a caveman diet that consists of mostly just meat and vegetables, no carbs, grain, and dairy. Supposedly everything should be organic as well, but in this day and age living off a college budget, it's hard. I still try and buy organic when I can though.

The first few days were harder than most as I tried adjusting what I ate and cooking took twice as long as now my boyfriend had to cook two different meals rather than one. Yet once the ball started rolling it did get easier. Yes, I said it, it does get easier. I could feel my body getting accustomed to the greens and protein and whenever we had those terribly nice cheat days, greasy food (even simple things like bread) just made me bloated and nauseous. It made me think that I never wanted to eat them again. Working out were the worse right after cheat days which then I've concluded, it's much better off not having them. The occasional (in small moderation) I think would be much better than stuffing your face on cheat days.

As I move along this new path that I'm taking with my health and diet, I thought I'd share a few dishes that I've been trying and that maybe you guys out there might want to try it out yourself. :)

Day One consisted of a Grilled Chicken with Mixed Fruits. We just added a simple shake of black pepper to each side and slapped it onto the grill. I picked out an apple and a few nectarines, chopped it up and used that as a side.  It's amazing how filling it is! ^__^

Happy Eating!
♥, Kitty

... Chicken Dinner

It's the start of a new year and yes, I haven't posted in a long while in between almost having three jobs and paying off bills whilst still in school, and trying to balance a social life: life gets hectic. Although from time to time I take a deep breath, take a step back and just relax. Well, it's close to midterms week and I thought I'd find a recipe that was full in nutrients and protein that will fuel my body to study this weekend. I decided to go with the one I used at my friend's housewarming party: a Lemon Chicken Mushroom Alfredo Pasta. Last time we used rotini and this time we decided to go with penne.

We started off going to Vons to get some chicken, being on a very tight budget, I'm always looking for the right bargain. Since chicken breast wasn't on sale, I opted for a large packet of chicken thighs for $5.31 (about 8-9 pieces), button mushrooms, and lemon. We also went with Classico's Creamy Alfredo  for the sauce. David cut the bone out of the thighs (we used about a piece each) and while he did that I sliced up the mushrooms and lemon that will be tossed in a wok to be stir fried.

These are the seasonings that we used to rub through the chicken. After we gutted out the bones, we put in some ground black pepper on both sides with some pink salt, and a few shake of parsley. Then we added Lawry's seasoning salt. Before putting the pieces onto the grill, take the lemons and squeeze out the juice over the chicken, let it sit for about 2-3 minutes. Once the chicken is cooking, stir-fry the mushrooms until brown, it's okay to use a box for two as once they cook they will dramatically shrink in size. After, we added in the sauce and let it simmer before taking it off the stove. Don't forget to set a pot aside with boiling water for your pasta. Boil your pasta to al dente as you will be cooking it twice with the sauce so that it'll be soft by the time you serve it.

Grill the chicken until it's golden brown, make a little slice if you want to to double check if it's cooked thoroughly. Take it off the grill and plate it. Next, we took the pasta, strained it and mixed it with the alfredo sauce in the wok turned the fire to medium and stirred it. After plating we added a dash of parsley on top of the penne as garnish for that finished look. :) Hope everyone that drops by or sees this, tries this home- it's super simple to make and a lot of fun! Until next time~!

Ciao!
Kitty~

Just Another Day...

I give you another easy recipe to work with for those weekend mornings with your loved one. :) Maybe even a bed and breakfast would sound lovely! It's a simple and tasty breakfast choice: Cinnamon French Toast with Powdered Sugar.

You only need a few easy ingredients from your local supermarket: eggs, cinnamon, maple syrup, white toast (try and find thick toast if you can), and powdered sugar.

We cracked the eggs into a separate bowl and added in a few dashes of cinnamon, then mixed them until it's slightly foamy. We then dipped the bread into the mixture and placed them on the fryer. Give it about 3 minutes on the stove before flipping it over (Make sure it's like this golden brown before flipping). Repeat process and place it on the plate after making however many you want. Lastly, shake powdered sugar onto the toast with another light addition of cinnamon. Drizzle the syrup and voila! :) Done! Nice and easy~ Hope you guys enjoy this one too. ^__^ Until next time!

Ciao!
Kitty~

Winter Dinner!

It's getting rather chilly out these past few days in Socal- I had a rather strong hankering for a bowl of soup that wasn't too heavy on flavor. Something light enough to warm the body and Di was craving pasta. After a few minutes of discussion and going out to get groceries, we decided to make Seaweed Egg Drop Soup and Creamy Chicken Marsala Pasta for dinner!

First up, I made the Seaweed Egg Drop Soup since it was so cold and really needed something warm. I boiled a pot of water added a speck of chicken bouillon, tossed in dried seaweed (not available in just any supermarket- I suggest going to a Chinese market) let it simmer until it softens then crack in the eggs. I like to use two, one to break the yolk, one so I can boil the yolk as a whole. Let it simmer again on low heat until serving time. Prep time: 2 minutes, Cook time: 5 minutes.

The main dish was the Creamy Chicken Marsala Pasta of course, Di boiled the pasta to al dente before mixing the chopped mushrooms, garlic, onion, and chicken with melted butter, 3/4 cups of Marsala Wine, chicken broth and heavy cream. We let the sauce boil in a pan until it was lightly thick then we mixed the two together then topped it off with Parmesan cheese and Voila! Dinner! Prep time: 10 minutes, Cook time: 15-20 minutes. Here's a link to a more detailed recipe: http://blogcritics.org/tastes/article/creamy-chicken-marsala-pasta/

Hope you guys enjoyed this dinner entree as much as I did as it did warm up my body from head to toes! :3 Until next time!

Ciao!
Kitty~

Six Two Six

I live in an area which many people refer to as the San Gabriel Valley, also known as the "626" within our community. It's given itself a reputation for good and authentic Chinese food, boba milk tea, and large Asian neighborhoods. It's a bustling jumble of culture! I'm what anthropologists called: "parachute kids", but instead of being a child shipped from Asia living in the United States, it's vice versa for me. For a good part of my childhood I've resided in different areas of Asia, Guang Zhou, Shang Hai, Hong Kong, you name it. I was then brought back to the United States to attend grade school when I was older. So, I was lucky enough to be brought up with a palette for Asian and American food. But I find that living within these two cultures, I'm still more amazed at the versatile use of ingredients within my own culture. Here's just a few of the dishes that I enjoy the most when I go out to eat:

First, we have the famous, Minced Pork over Rice or sometimes referred as the Pork Stew over Rice. Whenever I went back to Taiwan I was notorious within the apartment building as the girl who inhales bowls of these! It's relatively cheap, usually $3-$4 within the SGV. It's just your basic marinated pork pieces drizzled deliciously over white rice with a side serving of tea marinated egg and slices of yellow pickled radishes.

Here we have Hainan Chicken with Rice. Tender chicken with lightly oily rice, oil that originates from the chicken itself when they prep it. I really like the one from ABC Cafe and one from Savoy Kitchen whom are quite famous for them. This dish usually ranges from $7-$9 depending on which restaurant you go to.

For more dessert-like dishes, my favorite would have to be the Brick Toast (cinnamon or the coconut butter flavors are my favorite). The one from Tom n Toms is the best from the ones I've tasted so far and it's super close to my house so there's no fuss on how far I have to drive to get one. Although TnT is usually located in DTLA Korea Town... The closet one near the Walnut/DB area is on Goldensprings. These usually range from the $5-$7 give or take.

Those are only just the tip of the iceberg from the massive list of my favorite dishes but drop by the SGV if you're ever in the area or if you're craving good Chinese food! :) Until next time!

Ciao!
Kitty~

Change of Scenery

There was always this little hiking trail that I've passed by quite often on the way to school. It's located on Steep Canyon Road in Diamond Bar and there was a trail that lead to somewhere... I just didn't know where. Apparently, it lead to Sycamore Canyon Park! It was because Di and I decided to walk the dogs this evening and we walked from home to Sycamore Canyon Park, one that I had often visited when I was a child. It's dog friendly with plenty of dog bag posts all along the park and freshly filled with the scent of Mother Nature. :) It used to be filled with more trees and the creek ran all the way across the lower half of the park, but they've paved it and created a secondary playground for kids. A part of me was a little sad, but hey, more space for the kids to run around. The general hiking area is beautiful, just as gorgeous as I remembered it. Luscious green foliage covered by thick dark brown trunks and the sound of running water.

If you walk a little farther in, there's a place where you can walk down to a miniature waterfall. It's quite the scenic route to take if you're doing a after dinner walk with your husband or boyfriend. ;)

The dogs absolutely loved it, they were running around the baseball field and up the trail, it wasn't until we reached the steep stairs that our youngest baby, Adrian had trouble getting up the stairs, so just be wary of each of your pets, kids, and family members' ability to hike! The trail itself is a worthy exercise routine, from Di's house to the park to the trail and back was almost a total of four miles!

Happy Adrian! :D Hope you guys enjoy the park if anyone ever does decide to hop on by, it's definitely a hidden gem that should be preserved and visited! Until next time!

Ciao~
Kitty!