Life as a Design Student:

The Results of my Design Class! Messing around on the computer. (:

This Weather...

Has wrecked my room so bad that it's starting to smell like rotting wood and my ceiling is falling apart in MASSES. ):

This is the result of said 'thunderstorm':

I had to move my bed out to the living to sleep cause it overtook the space that I was sleeping in. So far nothing else is damaged. Hopefully this rain stops so it can get fixed. If not then I'll have to start moving my other things out. I miss my room. ):

Homemade Letter Paper!

A Little Faith...

I didn't really get the chance to meet him personally, but my first impression of him was pretty good. He seemed like a nice guy that my friend met during a party some time ago. His name was Kenneth Pak, or Ken as he introduced himself. We had dinner that night on August 19th 2010... At Red Robin in Chino and it was really fun. We sat in Jaq's car for so long just us talking and laughing about the most random things. He was an easy person to talk to and it made me feel really nice inside to know that there are still people out there that are so nice without an ulterior motive.

What shocked me the most was that the day after... I heard that he had gotten hit by a car later that night after we left the restaurant. He was longboarding on the sidewalk when he was hit, the coward just left him unconscious on the ground without even attempting to call the police. It was a few moments later that another person saw him on the ground that they called for the ambulance. He was in critical condition with severe head trauma along with head swelling, he was quickly transported to the hospital for surgery. Afterwards he was in a comatose state for several weeks until a few days ago that he finally opened his eyes and had begun using his arms and legs. For a person that had just met him, I am so relieved and happy for him and his family.

I write his because it amazed me what the power of faith can do to people, it brings everyone together for a cause and it makes people so much stronger. I was never one for religion, but after this incident happening to someone that didn't deserve it... I prayed so hard for him. Never in my life had I ever prayed so hard (well exception to the point in my life when my mother was fighting breast cancer) and I ask that if you see this post, please... Say a small prayer for Ken that he'll make a full recovery. Even if you're a complete stranger, it'll mean so much.

http://www.facebook.com/prayforkenneth

I just wanted to let you know...

How grateful I am that you are in my life.... ♥

A Letter Home

I had a discussion on the topic of 'friends' while on my way back from the beach yesterday with a good friend of mine, and while she was sleeping I did a little thinking. Why is it that I do not really like the idea of seeing my high school friends again? A lot of people even off to college learn to make time for high school friends when they come back home. For me, it's like the opposite, I wouldn't even try. I don't know what it is... It's not like I don't like them or anything, but I feel like it's time to see new things. Perhaps it was the tension that always seems to be there when we gather together or the fear that is instilled in me when I see a particular person. I really don't understand... I just don't get excited when people suggests reunion gatherings (though some people are exceptions).

For example. I had a really good group of friends during my senior year of high school... Had a lot of fun together. Even when we weren't doing anything it felt like just being with them was a productive thing. We were always there for each other and we made so many brilliant memories. But things happened when people started to mingle with each other within the group and things fell apart... They weren't able to fix everything so every time they see each other its like something's off. Something is not right. A knot forms in my stomach and I end up not being able to enjoy myself again. Then when college finally started, none of us really kept in touch with each other, we kind of drifted and formed new smaller groupings. Particular people would still be friends while others never came back. Maybe it's that or perhaps it's another cause for my dislike of reunion gatherings. The thing is, I just want people from high school to know that it's not that I don't want to see you or that I don't like you... Just I don't get too thrilled about these things. :/

Fruity Little Drinks

Dear Blog,

There's so many recipes that I want to tell you but there's so little time! I was working the bar the other day because the bartender wasn't around during the day shift so I had to jump in when people started showing up from the large party that were holding for them. I knew some basics, but my extent of knowledge on alcohol was VERY limited. So I took the liberty to ask a few customers what they liked and asked them how THEY drank and I'd just make it for them. :) I'd like to show you some that I learned that day. You don't have to drink it yourself, but it's nice to know a few on hands when you're having a party for older adults. :D

Frozen Mango Margaritas:

10 oz/Half a bowl of cut mangos

1/4 cup of lime juice (freshly squeezed)

1/2 cup of tequila (I had used a random one at hand, but preferably silver)

2 tablespoons of Cointreau

2 tablespoons of sugar

1 scoop of ice

Mix the tequila, lime juice, and Cointreau into a shaker and shake it lightly. Then pour it into the blender where your scoop of ice will be and at the end dump in the mangos and the tablespoon of sugar after it. Blend it on a medium power and voila! Garnish with a slice of mango and you're done! :)

Jack Coke:

1 tall chilled glass

1 scoop of ice

1 can of Coke

1 oz of Jack Daniels

Fill the tall glass with ice until full then add one ounce of Jack Daniel's (you can go stronger if you want) then fill the rest with one bottle of Coke until it touches the rim of the glass. :)

Shirley Temple:

1 1/2 tablespoon (give or take one squeeze of the bottle) of Rose's Grenadine (this is what I use)

1 scoop of ice

1 cherry

1 slice of orange

1 can of Sprite

A splash of orange juice

A splash of vodka (not too much, but optional)

First fill the cup with half ice then pour in the can of Sprite or fill until 3/4 way to the rim then give the Grenadine a squeeze and that will give it the color and the flavor of the Shirley Temple. You can add in the splash of OJ if you want and the vodka. That was how the lady drank it, I usually just finish with Sprite and the Grenadine for the kids. Then drop in a cherry and garnish with a slice orange or mint and it's set! :) Another drink~

There's still a lot of other recipes that I will post out later, but I'm thinking this is it for now. ;D I'll teach you how to make Black Bean Mexican Rice maybe in the next few days (it's very delicious and I'm quite happy that I was able to learn it)! Well, remember guys and gals to drink responsibly! :D

That's it for now,

`Tsuki

Sweet Crystals

Dear Blog,

So, I've been thinking about making some Rock Candy since I saw some back at Knott's the last time I went and they've jacked up the price since I went there as a kid. Seriously... one rock candy for 7 bucks? No thanks when I can make some at home that would only cost me a few tablespoons of sugar. :)

The materials you would need:

2 cups of water (later on boiled)

Several cups of sugar

Food coloring (optional if you want yours to be colored)

Glass jar

String (preferably yarn or a thick string type)/Stick (what I like to use)

Make sure everything's clean first, for instance wash the jar out with hot water so that it'll be easier to hold the boiling water that your'e going to put in it. Then you start off by boiling the actual two cups of water you've set aside then you add the sugar in teaspoon by teaspoon. Make sure that it doesn't accumulate at the bottom of the jar, stir until the sugar is dissolved and keeps adding until the water is completely saturated (when the sugar doesn't dissolve anymore). Pour the water into the jar. After, you tie the string to a long item (be it a pencil or a butter knife) and let it hang inside the water. Be careful that the string doesn't touch the bottom of the jar or any sides of it, or else the candy won't come out right. :) Then cover the top with a paper towel and let it sit for a few hours. Within 24 hours, you'll start to see that crystals has begun to form on the string! The longer you leave it, the bigger the candy will turn out. It's quite a fun experiment to play with if you're ever up to learn some neat chemistry stuff while making some delicious rock candies! :D

Food coloring/Food flavoring

If you ever want to change the color of the rock candy that you're making you can always buy food coloring and mix it in one drop at a time after you've poured your boiling water into the jar. Keep stirring until you've got your desired color. As for food flavoring, market places always sells them in little plastic bottles, just pour half teaspoon of the flavor each time until it tastes about right.

I hope you enjoy making your rock candies at home! ^_^

(This is also called a Rock Candy Cosmo :D)

That's it for now,

`Tsuki

Tartness of Your Cake

Dear Blog,

Like I had promised, I'm going to post up the recipe for that lemon cake:

1 cup of sifted all purpose flour

1/2 cup of oil or softened unsalted cultured butter

1/2 cup of milk/water (for lactose intolerant people)

1 cup of powered sugar (I put between 1/2 to 3/4 since I don't like things so sweet)

3 room temperature eggs

2 1/2 teaspoon baking soda

3 3/4 teaspoon of lemon juice (freshly squeezed)

3 oz lemon gelatin

1 small bowl of lemon rinds

Mix the sugar, oil, milk/water and eggs together first until it turns into this thick and foamy liquid. You can choose to separate the egg yolk and just use the egg white if you want, it's up to you. Eggs are usually used for leavening in baking, also for color, texture, flavor, and richness. I usually don't use the yolk when I'm making cakes that are red (like red velvet) or any hues of that color since it gives it this orangey shade after baking, but for that reason only. Except those cakes never rise as high as the ones that I use egg whites. Yes, egg whites create air bubbles in the cake when whipped, but yolks don't. They in fact do the opposite by making the cake flat. Also, yolks = denser cakes and egg whites = fluffier cakes. So, pick your options. (:

Then slowly blend your previous mixture with the flour and begin mixing it on a setting that's between medium or light until it's thick and ribbon-like. Set your oven at 350 degrees, let it sit until it's fully heated then put the batter in and set the clock at 20 minutes. Once it's done make sure to double check if it's thoroughly baked by sticking in a toothpick and checking if it's wet or not. If not then it's one step closer to being done! :D After taking it out, I would suggest letting it sit for a few hours until it's completely cooled before heading towards the decorating part.

Really, after the cake is done... The decoration ideas usually comes from the person making it. I will put out there that dark chocolate is a very good combination with the tanginess of the lemon flavor since dark chocolate has its natural bitterness that's not too overwhelming if used in the right proportions. So, have fun with it... Let your creativity out! :D

That's it for now~

`Tsuki

Nights in Phoenix

Dear Blog,

Oh my goodness... Scottsdale, Arizona... Was amazing! I was doubting whether or not I would be able to let myself have some fun, but knowing the right people can just make one trip turn into a trip of a life time. (:

The flight in general wasn't too bad, although my flight did get delayed for an hour so I wasn't stuck at the airport for 5 hours... I was there for 6. It's good that I went prepared! I had stocked myself with my DS (included with 4 extra games) and my iPod- which I found out had Solitaire and Blackjack on it. I know... Who knew? And was able to last myself pretty long when it was finally time to board the plane. The airfare to Scottsdale for US Airways was actually pretty cheap compared to all the other tickets that I've checked for other airlines. Since I ordered very last minute, literally a week before I went and it came out to be around 220 some odd dollars for round trip. I just checked for trips in May way back in March and the tickets were actually only 90-95 dollars! So order them early if anyone plans to go out of state and the cheaper the tickets will be! (: But I was a bit bummed that they didn't serve food on the plane, I suppose they only do that for international trips now? Oh well, it is what it is!

I will tell you this, Arizona has a really amazing view from the sky. I don't know how to explain it but it's really different from the city lights I see back home. There's something much more... Gentle and genuine about it in Arizona than the ones in Cali. But it's really pretty. I was really happy that I was able to witness such beauty that weekend! :D I landed around 8:30 pm Friday night and made my way through the airport... I felt like I had been transported back to the 80's. Hahaha! I don't think it's a bad thing in my opinion since I do like vintage looking styles, so I thought it was pretty amusing. The other thing I loved about Phoenix was that the weather was just... Fantastic. The air was cool but there was still lingering warmth from that day's sunlight so it resulted in this warm night with cool air blowing in every once in a while. It was perfection. ;) But as the sun completely sets behind the mountains, the weather does tend to drop a few degrees and it gets pretty cold.

I was picked up by my boyfriend, the love of my life at the moment. :D And we headed over to the hotel. I literally died after I took a shower, I didn't even remember falling asleep except the next thing I knew... It was morning. How did that happen? I wouldn't know what to answer you either. c(: Like he had promised, Tony took me to the zoo the next day. Since I was surprised to see one so close to the airport and he told me that he'd take me the next day if I wanted to. Of course I said yes... and it was really fun! I hadn't been to a zoo since I was a kid, so it was really fun being able to see all these different types of animals so up close. :O The zoo we went to was called the Phoenix Zoo. They had plenty of animals for different children and what I liked about it was that the place was HUGE! Took us an hour to get half way around one part of the park, but since we didn't put on sunblock... We were very close in getting burned by Arizona's baking sun. (The weather during the day can get sweltering and dry, I suggest lots of sunblock and water!).

On our way to the zoo... I saw a Smart Car... Aren't they cute? :D

After, we met up with a few of Tony's friends. That day I met, Ryan and his girlfriend, Vanessa. They were very friendly people. :) We met up at this outside shopping area, it's not like an outlet... It's more kind of like Fullerton or Pasadena if anyone's been out there, you'd probably know what I'm talking about. Hahaha! We grabbed lunch at Ra's Sushi and Bar located squeezed between these two other small boutiques. The place wasn't bad... But the food service was REALLY slow. :/ Ryan got kind of upset at how slow they were when they finally came with our food. I loved their edamame, but their miso soup was a bit too salty for my liking. If I had it with some rice maybe it would've been better. Although their Shrimp Tempura Rolls were so bomb! Yumm! We tried that one and three orders of California Rolls (Ryan's favorite, hahaha!) And Tony ordered an order of Unagi Roll, not my favorite, but he liked it. (:

One of Ra's newer plates of food. :D

We headed over to Scottsdale Fashion Square later that night. By the time we got there it was already sunset... The mall itself was so pretty with these lights dangling from palm trees and the place was just really amazing. ( > ω<)" It looked like a really ritzy place since the restaurants and shopping stores seemed like very high-end brands. Although I only ended up buying bunch of candy from the Sweet Factory with Ryan and Tony... It was all good. Hahaha! We met up with Ryan's brother, Hugh, a few hours later and caught a movie at one of the local AMCs. We debated what we wanted to watch and we ended up picking Repo Men, starring Jude Law and Forest Whitaker. The movie itself wasn't bad, I mean the story was interesting. It's about the near future where prosthetic organs exists and can replace any organ if you can afford it. But if the payment is late, it can be repossessed by these people called the 'Repo Men'. That's where Jude Law comes in. The ending to the movie was kind of weird and sad, but I won't say what it is so I won't spoil it for those who are going to watch it soon. =)

Scottsdale Fashion Square

It was actually pretty early when we got out of the movie theaters. Ryan and Hugh wanted to go hookah. A little fact on hookah: it was originally derived from India and became popular in the Arab world. It's a pipe with a flexible tube that draws the smoke through water. It's for smoking flavored tobacco basically. Ryan an Hugh coaxed Tony into going to a Hookah Bar with them called: Xhale. I was actually really surprised and asked if he was all right with going with them. I know he's really straight-laced about these things, but he actually agreed to go! :O I know, a total shock, right? All I can say is that it was a pretty wild/fun night. I'm totally seeing my baby in a whole new light... I kind of like this bad side of him. ;) Remember that it's 18+ years of age only!

Tony ;D That's some good Citrus Mint!

Ryan and Vanessa! Ryan's just going at it! =D

We got home around one-ish maybe? Couldn't really fall asleep right after so me and Tony crawled into bed and watched Ninja Assassins... With that Korean popstar, Rain. It wasn't as good as I expected it to be. Though the gore part met my expectations, but the story itself was a bit: blah. Fell asleep half way through the movie. Hahaha! Well, the morning after I finally got to go swimming like Tony said he would. Teehee~ it was super fun since I really didn't know how to swim with my head up, I had him carry me around the pool. ;D I think it was one of the funniest parts of the trip between just me and him. :) Though I didn't get to take pictures since I was scared I was going to drop the camera into the water. (I have a tendency to do stupid things like that). For lunch, we went to Mimi's with Ryan, Vanessa, and Hugh. It was our last dinner/lunch before I had to leave. =( But it was really fun being able to hang out with them. I must thank my cute boyfriend and his friends for taking me around this weekend. =)

Hugh's 12 rack ribs from Mimi's!

My Chipotle Chicken!

Tony's sandwich of deliciousness!

Since we were short on time we had to cut things short and most of us were pretty full and were falling into serious food comas. I know I did since I took a nap when Tony drove me to the airport. I felt rather sad that I had to leave so soon, I'm going to miss Arizona very much. :( It was fun while it lasted, though I'm planning my next trip in May. =) To see my baby on his birthday! Overall, the experience was truly something else altogether~ ^__^ I wouldn't forget anytime soon!

So long, Arizona!

That's it for now, until next time!

`Tsuki

Time & Time Again

Dear Blog,

So I'm all packed and ready to move back home. All I need to do is to place all my clothes back into the suitcase and I'm all set. The thing is I haven't told my cousin or roommate yet. Aye, I think I will sit them down for a nice cup of tea and talk it over. Perhaps a cold cup of iced green tea since this blasted weather isn't giving up anytime soon. Bleh. It's been so hot lately... It's ridiculous...!

So I stirred up a dark chocolate drizzled lemon cake last night and I just put on the finishing touches. I had made one earlier in the week for Tony. A strawberry one... But I made in such haste that it turned out really ugly. T____T The results were quite depressing. This time I actually made it right and I was thinking of giving it to a friend for his late birthday. Yet, I feel like eating it myself. *SIGH* Hahahaha! Well, I'll post the picture up for the final one after I get it up into my laptop. (:

That's it for now,

`Tsuki

I'll post up the recipe later since Megan asked~ (:

Remember υи∂єяʟαи∂

Dear Blog,

My baby's leaving in T- less than 5 hours! :O I'm excited yet at the same time sad about the whole thing. I'm sure with this experience, he'll grow even more mature about his career as to what he really wants to do. He's such an inspiration that I really wish that I had that kind of focus when it comes to my studies. Hahaha~ what can I say, we're completely different in this direction of stuff. But I guess that's what makes things so interesting since we always have different outlooks/opinions on topics relating to... Well, stuff. :) He's probably the only one that makes me feel like I should do good in school... In a way that's really different from my parents. He's always talking how he loved school so much and that it was the highlight of his life during that period that he was able to spend time with his friends studying until 3-4 in the morning. Or how how the trip to London changed his life around that made him want to finish school within 4 years (that landed a rather good job :D). I'm just really grateful that he's in my life, someone with such positive energy towards education and work. He teaches me things that I sometimes refuse to want to learn because of my naivety, he slowly teaches me these things so that I'd understand. Mmm, though I'm surprised that he'd handle my stubbornness so steadily. He ceaselessly amazes me still. (: Ah, he's packing his clothes into these vacuum package thingies... I find them supremely awesome to watch when they're in use. ^__^ (Yes, I am at his house at the moment :] ) I hope he comes home soon though. He'd even promise to invite me over to house again in July 4th to watch fireworks because his backyard has this amazing view over the city, and it's just absolutely beautiful at night~! It's a must see, really! Oh, he has this cute little doggy named, Ginger... I wanted to take a picture with her but she ran away from me. T___T That little pooper. :( Alright, time for stats! I will devour that subject! (Hopefully).

That's it for now,

`Tsuki

I'm going to miss you, love~

Running Out of Time

Dear Blog,

I feel the stress coming on pretty hard... Finals and the fact that I've thought about moving back home. Hmm, I don't know what to do yet. Even though I'm in the midst of studying/eating/doing nothing really ughh, I feel the pressure just building upon my shoulders. I can't wait until Spring Break starts and my trip to Arizona! :D Though I'm SO broke right now, so broke that I don't know what to do. x_x May God have mercy on my pitiful soul. Okay, so I've got art history almost done and I don't even know where to begin with Bio studies... ))): There's no review and such for that class. I'm hoping that the final is on Thursday. :/ I'm not sure and it's seriously pissing me off. I just don't want to do anything right now. Ahh! Someone please tell me a good way to to get rid of this piling up frustration that's in my system! Maybe it's because I procrastinate so much that I this feeling is nagging at me to keep studying. T__T Rawr, but I don't want to. Nooo! What to do! I feel like I'm in such a dilemma. Shiiit. I hate this feeling. Not only that, but the fact that I'm almost out of money and I don't have enough income to sustain my rent AND Tony's going to Arizona for who knows how long. Everything's just so frickin` depressing. T_____T *SIGH* Tony keeps telling me to look forward to the good things after next week, but how can I when these large obstacles called 'FINANCIALLY UNSTABLE' and 'FINALS' are clouding the path to a brighter weekend? D: I wish next week was the weekend already....♥ So I was visiting www.wititmeganstyle.blogspot.com 's blog and I fell in love with Dami Lovato's 'Catch Me' song. :D Okay, it's time for me to get back to studying... (I really can't wait till next quarter for Intro to Music!).

That's it for now,

`Tsuki

Idiocy in the Form of ⓛⓞⓥⓔ

Dear Blog,

Sometimes... I wonder if it's really all right. Maybe she was right the whole time, and I was just in denial. Because no matter how much it hurt hearing it from other people, in the end it could've ended up being the truth. I've always been so folly and naive when it comes to things like 'love'. I'm not afraid to admit that I find myself trusting people too easily only because I believe in giving chances. I know I never learn my lesson, trust too easily and I'll end up getting hurt. My stubborn heart just won't give up, just like a dandelion fighting a battle against a gardener. The more you pull, I'll just come back stronger the second time around. Sometimes I really do wonder why I keep going after suffering heartache after heartache? Someone once warned me to never let the man know how much I love him, because I'll always end up being the one loving him more than he does to me. I think in my case, that's how it is. Maybe I shouldn't have told him. I should've just kept it to myself. Should've closed that mouth of mine and let it be buried deep in my heart. In the past few days, the more I do fall for him the more I want myself to fall out of love and just let it remain it the simple 'I like you' sort of feeling. She once told me, "Never tell him you love him, because he'll never be ready, it'll always be too early. Well, at least that's what he told me." The weird thing was, it was right after the day I told him. That time, I cried myself silly at work. I just wished that he had told me to my face. At least I wouldn't have had completely destroyed my dignity. T_T

I guess relationships are full of things that I don't really understand. No wonder some people are so wary of it. Because at first I didn't understand why someone would just give up so easily. I had always believed in getting back up after someone breaks your heart because you'll never know what else there is unless you keep trying. Maybe happiness is just around the corner. Because happiness is worth the pain. I know it's because of my own insecurities that I often ask him the question if he actually likes me, he would always just smile and answer 'yes'. When I tell him that 'I love you' he would always find something else to distract him from answering me and I would always find myself going along with him. At that point, it wouldn't have mattered. It's strange, when I fell in love... Even though I'm happy, anxiety and selfishness also naturally increase. Like now, I'm anxious that he hasn't answered me. There's a part of me that's sad because I feel like I'm so petty-minded... Getting upset over such a trivial thing. I tell people that I'm not bothered by it, when in truth I actually lied. Sorry guys. ( - 3-)" I'm really bothered by it. It's the only reason why I'm on short fuses with him all the time. I don't normally get upset so easily about... Everything. I get mad and start to say mean things and it makes me wonder if I've always had this kind of horrible personality. ): He's never once told me, and even though I never expect him to because it's such a small issue... Why is it that I feel like crying at the end?

Deep down, I know the answer. I'm a fool. In reality I'm the one that's blind to his love... He shows so much of his feelings without having to use those words, and yet... I was so worried. Just because he hasn't told me, it shouldn't matter. I already know his feelings. Yet, his word are definitely dangerous, his words that always seems to be gnawing gently at my heart... (◡‿◡)･✿.｡.:*.:｡✿*ﾟ

(I wonder if I'd be able to keep going knowing that's all there is...)

Well, that's it for now,

-`Tsuki

Valentine's Day

Dear Blog,

I would like to say that I'm living a rather happy life right now, although I'm struggling financially... It's fun. In a way I'm learning that life out the help of my parents. I'm hoping that I get past the next few months and I should be okay by summer. (: No more school tuition and all that stuff. I can just focus on work and maybe get a few days off to do my own things. I haven't realized that I'm perfectly content with my life at the moment. I'm happy overall, even though I get into my fair share of arguments with my cousin or my boyfriend, I still find it lively. Life is busy. Maybe so that I sometimes do think about the lazy summer days where I would just lie on the grass at a park with Allan, and together we'd watch the sky before us letting our thoughts mingle lightly in the buzzing air of summer passing us by. And I wonder if I'd be able to do that again, maybe watch the sun set as the twinkle of city lights begin to wash over a city one by one as night falls all around me. It's a simple wish, a wish for something that I once had, but lost it to Reality. :/ Mm, I guess it can't be helped right? Hahaha! Can't always get what you want all the time. :)

Even though that's true, come Valentine's day.... Sometimes, that rule just goes out the window. ;) Sometimes, just maybe... Happiness exists on the same plane as reality. For once, I was able to spend this Valentine's day with someone special. =D Tony, surprised me with tickets to watch Cirque du Soleil's: Kooza. It was a brilliant show, but they wouldn't allow us to take pictures so I can't post any up. Booo! ): Then after we ended up driving up to Irvine Spectrum. My first trip there and the place was gorgeous! With the Ferris Wheel and Merry-go-`Round. Mm, gotta go back there one of these days! Then went to Red Robin's to eat... My god, I ate so much that night. -_- I'm amazed at my own stomach power and those Endless Fries. D: *SIGH* Well, I'm starting to amp up my room to look more decent... I may be able to post a picture of it after I'm done. Hopefully it turns out all cute like the way I wanted it. (Even though I'm limited to what I can do since it's an apartment >_<). Okay, it's late.. And I'm sleepy... so I'm going to head to bed. (:

That's all for now,

`Tsuki

Old Town

Dear Blog,

Currently in Biology 110. I'm super tired these days, I suppose it's because I work so much and I go to school. When I'm not doing that I'm studying for my classes. It's like that's all I do with my life. Gets really depressing, you know? [Sigh]. But I had a good weekend with my baby. ♥♥

Well, the Norton Simon trip was super boring like I predicted. I had always had a strong dislike of standing around and just stare at paintings all day. It was just so dreary, especially without Tony there. ): My secret: I was so depressed, I wanted to cry. I felt like I was a kid and someone had just taken my candy by a or something. T_T" But it was a good thing that that trip wasn't that long before we got out. Afterwards, me and him explored the Asian art downstairs by ourselves... Not what I had expected since everything was from Southeast Asia. I was hoping for something much from Eastern- Chinese and Japanese art perhaps. =) Then we went to Old Town Pasadena and shopped around for a bit. It was nice walking around and just trying out new things with Tony :3 (Nom, nom, nom!). It was like everything was back to normal again. Back to the days where we would do something interesting every week. But I know there we're too busy to be doing things all the time, especially since I moved to a much more expensive apartment where we have to pay for everything. -_-x Mm, oh yeah... I remember that I was supposed to let the world know that Dylan has finally realized that Alice was his age. It was the most hilarious thing in the world! It was like he had the biggest epiphany of all time, as if Buddha himself has enlightened the boy with the idea that Alice was a `07ner. Hahahaha! In the Book of Dylan, history has been rewritten! :O *Applause*.

It's almost Valentines' day! I hope for all those couples out there that you'll be having a wonderful time with that special someone. =) Because I know I will be, and as for those who are sitting at home alone... Get up, and get out! Go do something daring! Don't sit at home and mope. Being single shouldn't be a bad thing, it's not like the whole world is based on the intellect that a woman must be with a man at all times. Learn to love being with yourself and learn to appreciate the time that you have in getting to be with different people. (: Being alone doesn't mean you have to be sad. Open your eyes, there's just so many possibilities and opportunities. Take it and do something with yourself! Learn, live, love~ Isn't that what they're always teaching us as school?! :D

[I'm seriously procrastinating like hell... Should be doing homework, so I'm going to get back to that!]

That's it for now,

`Tsuki

Did my nails for February ! ♥

H&M at Old Town Pasadena...?

Matthiola Incana

Dear Blog,

They say that patience makes the heart grow fonder, but it forgot to mention that sometimes being alone hurts too. Maybe it's the selfish part of me that's asking for too much, but... I wish there was just more time. At first, the thought of being further away from him sounded better in my head... At least I could miss him that way, but I had come to realize how much I hated it. I didn't want anyone to know, didn't want people to see this ugly side of me, but I just had to put the thought somewhere.

At beginning, I didn't mind (though I am not sure), but now I get melancholy thinking about it. I just really miss what we had at the beginning. Back when everything was easy and that I got to see him every week. Nowadays, I still do get to see him, but something changed. It's like before I knew it, reality came running back to me in no time. I know I should be thankful that he comes out of his way to see me, but there's a part of me that wants more. Even though I do, I'm just too gutless to ask plus it'd be selfish. I know I am... But I can't help it. He even pointed that out that I am, and although I know my own problem, I didn't realize how much it would hurt hearing it from him. I do try to change, but it's just difficult. And because that I'm this selfish little child, I see myself always hogging him away from his real life, his family, his friends. I don't want that. I want him to be able to be with them, and have fun and remember. It's possible because of my conflicting emotions that I feel like he's so far from me even though he's right next to me. It's like he's fleeting and I'm just here... Standing and watching him walking further and further away. The more I know him, the more I feel he's going somewhere far...

I'm only 18 and he's 23, our worlds are so different. There's a 5 year gap, to me, it didn't seem much at first, but then I realized that he saw the world so much more differently then I did. In a way, I don't understand anything that goes around him... The world that he lives in. He won't talk about it, and he won't show me, I'm completely clueless. Why do I get this feeling that he's protecting me, securely wrapping me so I don't get hurt? But I want to know, I want to understand and be able to stand next to him and not feel so lost.

I'm a hypocrite because sometimes... I wish I wasn't in a relationship... If it came to be this complex and confusing.

The Harvest

Among the countless people in the world, you're going to meet with just one special "someone". Even if you don't know it, your heart will know. So when you find him, please have faith and don't hesitate. Let the flower that belongs only to you... Bloom.

- Yukino