My, how the tables have turned...

Ok, yes Ed Elric is a fictional character from a manga called 'Full Metal Alchemist' and I don't care that it would sound stupid if I talked about him like a real person. He gets what's it like having a younger sibling that's freaking growing up right before your eyes and sometimes a person is just too stubborn to believe that it's happening because in that person's eyes he/she is still the 'wittle brother or sister' and it's the older siblings job to protect them from well... pain and suffering. Even if that older sibling hasn't been doing a real good job of keeping tabs on her younger sister and now she's dating... things that will happen in the future that she's just got to except: her younger baby sister is growing up and there's she can do to stop it. I wanted to give her space and let her grow on her own accord, let her have the freedom that some older siblings don't intend to let their younger sibs have due to fears of getting hurt? I don't really understand, but today the news sort of hit me full face front like a book sailing across the room and hitting me smack dab in the face, knocking me out cold. To me she was still lil' old her and always will be but she's grown up now, but I'll always treat her the same, as the way I think of her: the little tattle tale, back stabbing girl that I grew up with as my baby sister. She's so like Ed's little brother... Alphonse: the one with the sense and morals between us, the one who always knew what to do in times of stress and saddness, like Al my younger sister was the voice of reason in the family, she was patient when mother or father got angry with me or when a fight had just broke out among the family. It was always like to her to bring everybody back, but still the same blood run in our veins and the same temper underlies somewhere under all the layers of reason and patience. Yeah you can say that she's the ratioal one of the two of us. Whereas I'm exactly like Ed: we swore so much that it would land us in Hell for awhile and we're both hard headed and stubborn up to a point where it's hard to talk to us without getting angry. We block out anything that we don't like or don't want to believe in because the change scares us, we cry ourselves to sleep at night for all the sins from the past and we're both pretty narrow minded on what we believe in when we set our minds to it we'll stoop down to any level to get it done. We're both pain in the buttock and we have great pride in being the eldest ones in the family and our temper is easily set off, both of us are like ticking time bombs ready to go off. Not only that, we both share a simliar hatred towards our fathers in ways no one would really understand, because how can you hate your own father? Well words can't really describe it..only experience can tell you the truth in why we do. Only thing is... he's a much better older sibling than I am, Ed actually knows what goes on in his brother's life protecting him all the time, putting himself first instead of Al; they learn from each other... and Ed's not even real let alone be such a great brother even though at times his stubborness can really be a pain in the ass to handle.

I don't care what you think as you're reading this whether you think I'm ludacris for talking about a ficitional character like that, or that I'm over exaggerating things and being too emotional about such a small case: but it's important to me and if you can't even understand that than you can just kiss my ass and go to hell.

Temporary 3 day weekend ;D

So this week it was quite different.. it was quite funny actually.

Friday- So on Thursday night I was out almost all evening trying to find my English book and I had to go and retrieve my damn transcript for my summer school crap. So because of that I wasn't at school for the poster painting that I had promised that I would go to to [it was because of the mere thought of retaking APUSH over summer that made me hurry on over to Fullerton that was fucking LONG ass far away.] Well upon that incident I came home to find that something had happened during rally set up that now it was canceled which kind of sucked I was looking forward to it.. -___- the time we spent on the poster I was ready to win.. Well anyways Mr. Paul came and told us of a rumor that had gone around about a shoot up that was going to happen the next day and I swear it was mass hysteria online at night... it eventually turned out to be only half true.. but still 3/4 of the students stayed home on Friday including myself. I didn't do anything but watch TV and study all day.. but it was a good day. "Ditching is healthy for you."

Saturday- Went on a yacht ride with Connie and them people... there was like 20 of us? It was a lot more fun than I had expected it to be, the fear of being alone almost made me stay home and study some more [how pathetic] after I went to the DMV... but I think that was the thing... I don't care how silly it sounds but I think Fate wanted me to go... that the fact that THAT DMV closed when it was suppose to be opened.. I had nothing else to do that the circumstances made me turn around and be forced to go. The works of destiny and the force of fate erg.. how they work. We said hi to any boats that held people and it was fun cause most of them waved back except that one where it was a teenage girl and I could almost feel the attitude reverberating from her body... we ate a lot with the sandwiches and the snacks that my stomach revolted against me for eating so much as the waves crashed upon the ship and well you know the rest: we took like agajillion pictures ;). After that I we went back to Connie's place and kareoked till our voiced were hoarse and tired out... over all the trip that day was quite pleasing.

Sunday- Somehow I was so tired from the yacht trip that I slept for thirteen hours the next day and afterwards I woke up and watched TV some more then I did my homework. Went to Life for dinner and came back... what a boring Sunday..

Erg...

Can't shake the feeling that something is utterly, terribly wrong somewhere. You can say it's like 'can't shake the feel of impending doom in the future.' it's like that and it FUCKING sucks. I didn't really do anything today except miss out on poster painting and those 2 points [that makes 5 points and which I'll never get back..D:] if that's what the feeling is for then "fuck I'm so screwed... -____-" I really hate this feeling it's like you're staring at a painting at a museum and it's freaking crooked but you can't do anything about it because you can't touch... but use that irritation multiply it by ten and add ten pounds of 'impending doom' feeling to it.. ( - 3-" ). And because I missed out is because I had to get my transcript that my fucking GLC told me to reget ALL the way in Fullerton that bastard... then along the way we got FUCKING lost or something because we ended up at Cal State instead and father and I bickered at the admins. desk until finally I screamed that we're at the wrong school, the admins. people took a look at my id card and told me that I was right we were to drive a little more south to the community college. It was driving in circles all over again -_____-. Then we went book searching whcih took another 3 hours because every single fucking book store was either sold out or closed down due to 'lack of business'; lack of business my ass. I swear if I didn't want to be an 'A' student I would've given my English teacher a piece of my effing mind! We finally made it back to DB exhausted and moody... my patience was tested today and it was stretched pretty thin... Then went to Super H Market and I swear it's like EVERYBODY got a job there or something.. I knew it was going to happen.. the first chance they get ._."

I figured out why I had been having those bad feelings... If there is a God out there, I'm praying hard and you better be listening.

I wish my relationship is based on arguments, wrench throwing, swear words being thrown at each other, and little kisses that makes everything all right again. I can't believe I'm jealous of a fictional relationship...

A Dream -

Monday - Tuesday: School is piece of shit and a lousy fucker.. D: It's like eating away my brain as I try to study for it it's like it never helps or something... and then there's poster painting since last week and it's getting so effing cold that by the time I bust out the paint brushes I can't feel my fingers anymore -___-" it's so gay... Ok onto other things that aren't relevent...

A Dream-

I feel kind of sad knowing that one night I ruined something that could've been.. but I made a really stupid mistake and in those hours everything deteriorated to nothing. I wish that he would just talk to me again.. even though I know he can't forget that night and all the things we've done. Playing that game- it was a sin, taking that sip- it was a sin. Everything we did that night was a sin I guess? I'm not sure, how come he's not willing to forgive me for all the things that's happened between us? I'm willing to start a clean slate even though it might be tough at first because it'll be awkward to just let it slip by.. but all these things that I'm saying are just assumptions.. I've lost my confidence in my point of view of things.. but I wish that he would just talk to me.. ]:

And so,

they ditched 6th period and went blazing... [again] right after they did it during lunch. Unbelieveable... you don't walk into class faded that badly, actually the logic of coming back to school like that makes no sense to me what so ever. So they decided to blaze [again again] after school and that they would meet up and go somewhere and just chill for the day. Sounds nice.. after that part I lost them to the wind..well If there is a God out there I pray that they're ok, they've all I've got to satisfaction in life and I don't want to have to lose it so fast.

The election announcements came in... and Bobby won ]: not that I won't congratulate the guy or anything but I just thought that Will should've won instead. He's got everything to be the best president anyone could've seen but yet they choose Bobby because he was more fun... at some point I thought the election was just too biased all based on whether you like the person or not. On the brighter note.. Lawrence won Finance xD <3

Friday Misadventres: As he promised, went out with Allan tonight along with Michael, Juju, and Kev. It was one of those random trips that we make around Diamond Bar and eventually hang out so late that we end up with no ride and so our parents get all pissed at us, but it's all good in the neighborhood aiite?? (: We started at my house eating then Juju's mom picks me and her up and we went to her house for like 4 hours until Allan called and pulled us into another one of his 'misadventures' hahahahaha. It was good to be back... for awhile there I was getting quite lonely without him. You can see that, that fool is my drug now, I'm addicted and dependant on him without him for awhile I suffer withdrawals which isn't too pleasant I could tell you. But I digress, we took so many pictures at Juju's house that I don't know how I'm going to post them all up it's gonna take so much time. Fuck. -_____-". After that we went to Heritage for like 30 minutes to watch Allan skate and play with the swing sets xD then we took that 'conehead' home following with Michael... I went back to Juju's house and we watched 300... and the holiness of their abs makes me so jealous that they have such defined muscles that gleam with such intensity when they're under the sun... it almost burned a hole in my eye. [Well I was playing with Pokemon: Pearl more than watching the movie =)]. Oh my.. I fell asleep at the laptop without even finishing this blog... oops xD. I had the strangest dream... it was like I was in a movie or something there was these ugly ass alien things that was like taking over this one city and like so the citizens took action and it was all crazy with blaring guns and everything... O___O

The little surprises in Life makes it that much more interesting... (:

When the Rain started

It's Friday morning and I rather be sitting here listening to the rain drop against my windows than do my English homework and math (in where I have forgotten to bring my book with me). I do really have a bad habit of procrastinating online, I mean I don't even know what I do when I go on all I do is look for new music to listen to.

When the rain started...

This week was ok by my standards except that it's getting cold around here.. like 48 degrees and such. Oh shit. That means n clothes and jackets, shoot I hate shopping gets my legs all cramped and shit and I tire out easily. During 5th period Jake got all hyped about this one particular song and it was so funny cause he started singing along with it, I asked him what he was so happy about and he replied "Dude listen to the song man, he's talking about MARY JANE, one puff and the pain will go away. He's talking about weed.". Well I guess I can check that off my list: Watch Jake sing. All I need left is get him to dance for me... The election went pretty well today most of the people I voted for won, but sadly the people I wanted to really win was in a tie with someone I didn't want to win...is that mean to say? Tomorrow's a revote: Lawrence vs Elmer and William vs
Bobby Herman... I hate having to choose. ]:

Remind myself to bring an umbrella tomorrow... and to update this thing every other day.